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Category: Studio
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The lamp is lit.The dog–come now.Efficient government,conspiracy to disregardReality. Things I’ve been struggling with:afraid of the sharp,familiar and careful,Failures appearingfull of Potential. I’m sharing with you–image &sensation,Burned holes and Absence.Freeing, a dance with The heater,The candle,The incense,The dog. I’m scared–I’m strange–I love. I see.
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I’m done smiling.Tired of trying.I’m tired of faking. Always taking Bad directions.Spectacular trees,The sky and seaKeep lying to me. Sparkly gems Stop pretending it’s good luck get-tingbit-ten. Cursed feelings are Heavy andsuffocating,stuck replaying– Do you remember when?You followed me to my room–Leaning in.I didn’t want to Remember the spankinghitting screaming Whenever I’m crying–It’s bad,WrongAnd insulting! Objectified and told– How do I not…
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Take me by the hand.Eyes adoring.Moving slowly,Please?Take me away from here.Again & again.Turn me from dyingInto ignition.OhNo
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running awayflip, flop lost a shoeclip, clop coming for you,can’t stop hacked in twochip, chop red blood flewdrip, drop— down,down,down, in thebasement your pieces plop!
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Joy stained with sadness. Spreading. Searching in the mirror: Hello and goodbye, hello–echo–hello! Goodbye, goodbye. Internal guard. Distracting. Defensive. Avoiding what happened before… Faltering. A puddle. A wrinkle of sadness in everything, for in your noticing is its ending–begin and end, begin and end–what happens in between the beginning and ending? Peace into pieces. Or…
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I brought a large blanket and laid it out. I sat down and began thinking—about nothing in particular, nothing of interest. It was more of a noticing: green clouds of pond growth blooming to the surface, a swan bobbing for fish, trees, light green and white, shimmering in the wind, a blue sky. There was…
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The cup spills over from beneath the spigot. Moments spent receiving, while I keep track. Waiting for something to happen. Buying time. Pretending to pretend,I know what I’m doing. The cup remains, overflowing. Receiving, figuring—just give me a moment. Something comes next…But, wouldn’t I rather not? Shaking, I remove the glass from the endless outpouring andput it to my…
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Fear. You son of a bitch. It’s hard to let walls down. It’s hard to be vulnerable. I’ve done bad things because of it. I’m not always rational. Like when I pulled a knife on my ex at the dinner table. Honestly, all I’m trying to say is, I’m not perfect. I’m scared. But that…
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I reach for the stem, afraid to ask—can it exist? Small parachutes of silver, begging with tears—promise me it’s going to be okay. Cheeks full of air, a smile in the shadows, I release you in a whoosh, little seeds everywhere. I grab the next one—To letting go! And lie on my back. The sun…
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Sweating. Tossing, turning. Sleeping, alarm blaring, smoking. Snot covered, sniffling, screaming. Wiping, aimless shuffling. Searching. Avoid sharp objects. Avoid trees on walk with dog. Stumbling desire. Shifting, sweet. In line, hopeful. “Next!” Stepping forward, “An ice cream cone.” An end to suffering. Tapping screen, pausing– “The machine’s down, sorry.” Laughing.
fitveggielife 